I attended my first class in a series of 6 journaling classes at a neighbor's home this afternoon. There were a dozen women in the class. I wasn't sure how much I'd enjoy it - I suppose I wondered if I'd 'fit' in. I guess I often wonder where I fit, but that's another journal entry. One of the topics discussed today was the fear of having your writing read, and my soul did a somersault as I recalled a painful experience that reflected that fear - Fear revealed. A jealous boyfriend, a red felt pen 3 dozen yellow roses next to the open circled and highlighted journal - the rest is best unsaid. Fact is, it does happen. Boundaries are crossed and a severe case of curiosity can overcome someone's best moral judgment and at worst, an absence of integrity. And it is A W F U L. Reeling from memories of my incident, I offered a solution. How about a safety deposit box? A joke. But not as funny as the workshop leader, Kathy Legg suggested - Hide it in a Kotex napkin box...who would look in there? The crowd roared. Then she offered a potential 'con' - what would one think if they were to see a row of Kotex napkin boxes lined neatly up on her bookshelf? Valid point. After the first class, I had an AH-HA. I detest 'political correctness' and yet I keep to myself - an extroverted introvert. Bit of a hypocrite too. Since I don't particularly want to be a hypocrite, AH-HA step 1 I decided was to take a self-portrait, this time of my FACE, heaven forbid. But not just the face, my face in a rear view mirror - symbolizing that I was 'putting the past' behind me - a coming out, if you will. After all, what is the FEAR? Am I going to be voted off the island? Have at er! The traffic was light and slow. So witty (read: foolish) me, pulled it off, unscathed, and revealed. But the best part is the irony. So self-centered in capturing this AH-HA moment, I didn't see the helicopter until I downloaded the image. What do you think? Is it heading toward my head or carrying away my fear? I've decided I will think it's circled around and is on its way out. ba-bye f e a r. Not a big deal for most people, but from someone who is painfully camera shy (my past self-photos are of my feet) THIS WAS A BIG event.... I apologize for the frown. I don't plan on trying to improve my rear view mirror self-photo shots anytime soon (aka - don't try this at home) but I peeled off one layer of insecurity today and for that I am grateful to Kathy. The jury is still out on where to hide the journal. If you read this far, then you must be one of two people...Marjorie or Linda. Thanks guys for letting me ramble. If you aren't one of the aforementioned, then perhaps I've found a new friend!